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----------------------------------------- An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he in sisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes, Dad, what is it?" "Don't be nervous, son; do your best and just remember, if it doesn't g o well, if something happens to me your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife...." ----------------------------------------- The older we get, the fewer things seem to be worth waiting in line for. ----------------------------------------- Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved. ----------------------------------------- When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra. ----------------------------------------- I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top. ----------------------------------------- One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. ----------------------------------------- Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. ----------------------------------------- Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you. ----------------------------------------- If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old. ----------------------------------------- First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down. ----------------------------------------- Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.. Today, it's called golf. ----------------------------------------- California vintners, in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produces Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic. It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night. The new wine will be marketed as...PINO MORE.. I HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE
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