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Air Force One stops at a bright red carpet along which the President strides to join Queen Elizabeth II in a beautiful, ornate 17th-century coach hitched to SIX enormous matched white horses. The coach proceeds through the streets of London en route to Buckingham Palace, the Queen and the President waving to the cheering throngs.

Then suddenly the right rear horse produces a thunderous, cataclysmic fart that reverberates through the air and rattles the doors of the coach.

Uncomfortable, the reaction of the two powerful figures is to focus their attention elsewhere and behave as if nothing extraordinary had happened. But the Queen is the first to realize that ignoring what had just happened is ridiculous.

She explains, "Mr. President, please accept my regrets - I'm sure you understand that there are some things that even a Queen cannot control."

President Bush replies, "Your Majesty, please don't give the matter another thought -- you know, if you hadn't said something I would have thought it was one of the horses!