When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at its intended victim during a holdup in Long
Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire
wonder: He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
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The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a
little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting
negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine out
and lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
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A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in
Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he
shot her.
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After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20
mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped.
Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus-stop and offered
everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental
hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre
fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
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An American teenager was in the hospital yesterday recovering from serious head wounds
received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told
police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train
before he was hit.
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A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to
determine the cause of her daughters swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2
seconds to say "Your daughter is pregnant." The mother turned red with fury and
she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would never compromise
her reputation by having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched
the horizon. The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out the window!
Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying attention ma'am.
It's just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the East, and three wise
men came. I was hoping that they would show up again."
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