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| Variations On Murphy's Law | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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1. The Law of Common Sense: Never accept a drink from a urologist. 2. The Law of Reality: Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose. 3. The Law of Self Sacrifice: When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last. 4. The Law of Volunteering: If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead. 5. The Law of Avoiding Oversell: When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse. 6. The Law of Motivation: Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster. 7. Boob's Law: You always find something in the last place you look. 8. Wailer's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself. 9. Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. 10. Law of Volunteer Labor: People are always available for work in the past tense. 11. Conway's Law: In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired. 12. Iron Law of Distribution: Them that has, gets. 13. Law of Cybernetic Entomology: There is always one more bug. 14. Law of Drunkenness: You can't fall off the floor. 15. Heeler's Law: The first myth of management is that it exists. 16. Osborne's Law: Variables won't; constants aren't. 17. Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program. 18. Weinberg's Second Law: If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would have destroyed civilization.
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