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Employee Evaluation

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Name: _____________________ Date: ________

Position: ___________________

===============================================
Knowledge:
[ ] The Son of a Bitch Really Knows His Shit!
[ ] Knows Just Enough To Be Dangerous.
[ ] Only Has Half a Brain and is Dangerous.
[ ] Fucking Brain Damaged, His Coffee Cup Has a
     Higher IQ.

Accuracy:
[ ] Does Excellent Work If Not Pre-occupied With
     Pussy.
[ ] Pretty Good; Only Occasionally Blows it Out His
    Ass.
[ ] Has to Take His Shoes Off To Count Higher Than
    Ten.
[ ] Couldn't Count His Balls And Get The Same Number
    Twice.

Attitude:
[ ] Extremely Cooperative (If You Kiss His Ass Daily).
[ ] Brown Noser In Good Standing.
[ ] Often Pisses Off Co-Workers, Thinks He Owns the
    Damn Place
[ ] Doesn't Give A Shit, Never Did, Never Will.

Reliability:
[ ] Really A Dependable CockSucker.
[ ] Works So Hard That He Has To Take An Extra Day
    Off Each Week.
[ ] Can Rely On Him To Be The First One Out The Door.
[ ] Totally Fucking Worthless.

Appearance:
[ ] Extremely Neat, Even Combs His Pubic Hair.
[ ] Looks Great On His Days Off.
[ ] Dirty, Filthy, Smelly Son Of a Bitch.
[ ] Flies Leave Fresh Dog Shit To Follow Him.

Performance:
[ ] Goes Like A Son Of A Bitch...If There's Money In It
    For Him.
[ ] Does All Kinds of Good Shit At Evaluation Time.
[ ] Works Well After An Enema.
[ ] Couldn't Do Less If He Were In A Coma.

Leadership Skills:
[ ] Carries A Chain saw And Gets Good Results.
[ ] Macho Attitude, Commands Total Disgust.
[ ] Dog Fasted For Three Day Last Time He Brought Home
    Pork Chops.
[ ] Mother Teresa Told Him to Get Fucked.

===============================================

I Understand That I Have Been Counseled And Understand My Rights Under The Privacy Act Of 1974. I Further Acknowledge That I Am Fucked Up And Worthless As A Football Bat, And I Will Make Some Kind Of Attempt To Correct My Obvious Deficiencies.

____________________________
Employee Signature (If He Can Write)

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